Tuesday, September 3, 2013

$ylve$ter $tallone

When I heard the news that Sylvester Stallone is coming to New York Comic Con this year, I went nuts. I mean, it's Stallone! Sly himself! I will be in the same building as one of the biggest action stars of all time!

I am not delusional (something that I feel I have to say a little too much these days). Just because he's going to be at Comic Con doesn't mean I'll get the chance to meet him. I'm sure everyone is going to want to meet him and it's probably going to cost some money.

What's that? It's going to cost how much? Three dollars and 95 cents? No. There's no way. Three HUNDRED and ninety five? Dollars?

That's right. If you want to meet Rambo himself, you're going to have to drop $395.00 on that table just for an autograph. Even more for a picture with his holiness. That is super duper bullshit.

Most of you will probably go "Yeah, F that. I love Stallone, but I'll save the money and go watch his movies." To those of you actually considering paying that money to meet his majesty, I want you to think about something. I want you to think about the night you meet him. After it's all said and done, you're home, 400 dollars lighter, with the experience of Sylvester Stallone taking your money and not giving a shit who you are. Is that really how you want to meet someone famous?

As for me? I will not be meeting Stallone because I don't want to have to take out a Stalloan.

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